Good Times!
For the last nine days I've been in Uganda, teaching at a school for three full days and staying at the family home of the gentleman who runs the school, Pastor Godfrey. On the last day Pastor Godfrey took me to a restaurant a few streets away from the village school. The waiters in Ugandan restaurants often bring a bowl of cold water to the table with some soap and a little ladle, just before and after the meal. You hold your hands over the basin and hold the soap, and the waiter ladles some water over your hands. It's very pleasing, actually - the African equivalent of the pre-meal hot towels at Japanese sushi bars.
This particular restaurant was well outside downtown Kampala, and my impression was that they hadn't had many white people (muzungos) in that restaurant before. I washed my hands without incident before eating, and then we ate our lunch, and then the waiter brought the after-meal wash. I held my hands over the basin, and the waiter, looking so eager to please me, poured the boiling water over my hands.
My brain had no idea what was going on. It thought spiders!, and I jumped up, knocking over my chair and shaking my hands frantically to get the spiders off. Pastor Godfrey and the waiter looked at me, surprised. By then I'd realized heat, not spiders and said "The water's too hot."
Pastor Godfrey dipped his finger in the water and got angry at the waiter. "It's too hot, man!". The waiter tried it himself; to test it, he put just the tip of his finger onto the very surface of the water a fraction of a second at a time, with an puzzled expression that asked this is too hot? He left to get us cooler water, and this time I tested it before letting him pour it. A bit better, but still, way too hot! I told him just to bring some cold water and after that everything was fine.
Talking about it afterward, Pastor Godfrey and I weren't sure exactly why this happened. Our theory is that the waiter had never brought the wash basin for a muzungo before, and he knew that muzungos liked hot water, but he overestimated just how hot we like our water.
The funny thing is that every time I looked down at the red marks on my hands for the next few days, I was delighted more than anything else. And telling this story still delights me.
This particular restaurant was well outside downtown Kampala, and my impression was that they hadn't had many white people (muzungos) in that restaurant before. I washed my hands without incident before eating, and then we ate our lunch, and then the waiter brought the after-meal wash. I held my hands over the basin, and the waiter, looking so eager to please me, poured the boiling water over my hands.
My brain had no idea what was going on. It thought spiders!, and I jumped up, knocking over my chair and shaking my hands frantically to get the spiders off. Pastor Godfrey and the waiter looked at me, surprised. By then I'd realized heat, not spiders and said "The water's too hot."
Pastor Godfrey dipped his finger in the water and got angry at the waiter. "It's too hot, man!". The waiter tried it himself; to test it, he put just the tip of his finger onto the very surface of the water a fraction of a second at a time, with an puzzled expression that asked this is too hot? He left to get us cooler water, and this time I tested it before letting him pour it. A bit better, but still, way too hot! I told him just to bring some cold water and after that everything was fine.
Talking about it afterward, Pastor Godfrey and I weren't sure exactly why this happened. Our theory is that the waiter had never brought the wash basin for a muzungo before, and he knew that muzungos liked hot water, but he overestimated just how hot we like our water.
The funny thing is that every time I looked down at the red marks on my hands for the next few days, I was delighted more than anything else. And telling this story still delights me.
Labels: travels, Uganda, waiters do the darndest things
posted by Robert at
7:17 AM
6 Comments:
Two details in the story aren't exactly accurate.
First, the adjective boiling isn't quite right. Just-boiled would probably be more accurate, though I'm not sure if even that's the case. All I know for sure is that it was easily the hottest water I'd ever had my hands in. It hurt a bit for a day or two after, and there were a few red marks on my hands, but there were no burns requiring treatment. I've thought about experimenting with hot water to see just how hot water would have to be to leave exactly those red marks, but it's not an experiment I particularly want to run again.
The second false detail is that the plural of muzungo isn't muzungos. In the Ugandan language, modifications are added to the front of the word. Thus, the plural of muzungo is buzungo, the Ugandan language is called luganda, and Ugandan culture is buganda, etc.
Everything else in the post, to the best of my memory, is true. And the meal, for those who are curious, was chapati and stewed goat.
Welcome home, Robert!
I vote for "Heat, Not Spiders" as the title of the next Gazetteers album.
Thank you, Jack! Here's some more self reference, just because.
Anagrams for heat, not spiders:
Headstone trips
A posher dentist
Atrophied Nest
Also if there was something that was both heat and spiders, it might be called speat.
We just returned from two weeks in northern Uganda, planning to assist the people in one of the larger refuge camps. While dining with the family of our host priest, we also experienced the hand washing, but only before the meal and not with hot water. I hope that otherwise your stay in Uganda was uneventful and free of both spiders and very hot water. God bless, Barb
Hi, Barb! Don't know if you'll read this, but thought I'd post a comment here anyway. Yes, my trip was good in almost every way. Very few spiders.
You said you were "planning" on assisting people. Did that not work out? Or did you mean you're planning another trip in the future?
Handwashing Africa
Post a Comment
<< Home