Meanwhile, in New Jersey
Hillary Clinton emerged victorious in the Garden State's primary today. Apparently her people are pointing to their strong showing among NJ's Hispanic voters (because who speaks more directly to the Latino community than an uptight white woman in an ill-fitting pantsuit). But I'm guessing I know the true reason: The junior Senator from New York spent a shitload more money here. I am basing this on the fact that I received 6 voicemails from the Clinton campaign in the past two days, and none from the Obama camp. (Pssst, Barack: most modern calling plans don't charge extra for long distance—you can pay a flat monthly fee for unlimited calls!)
The recorded call from Hillary, I expected. As did I anticipate the message from Bill. The one that caught me off-guard today? Jack Nicholson. Sorry there, pal, and I know you're a Jersey native, but if you really want me to take political advice from you, stop making late-career dreck like The Bucket List. (Obama fan George Clooney, on the other hand, has a very respectable and consistent Tomatometer record.)
And hold on, Senator Obama, I'm not letting you off that easy. If on Monday you send me an e-mail with this subject line:
From: Barack Obama
Subject: One last thing...
Jack --
Tomorrow is Primary Day in New Jersey, and I'm writing to you with an important reminder to vote and to make sure that your family, friends, and neighbors get out and vote too.
Then on Tuesday, you are NOT allowed to send me an e-mail that begins:
From: Barack Obama
To: Jack Silbert
Sent: Tuesday, February 5, 2008 7:00:06 AM
Subject: RE: One last thing...
Jack --
Today, you can join nearly half the nation in saying that we are tired of business-as-usual in Washington, we are hungry for change, and we are ready to believe again.
Oooh I'm mad. I guess what I'm saying is, don't try me, folks. Or I'm likely to once again cast my ballot for the only candidate who has always been there for me—the Trix Rabbit.
The recorded call from Hillary, I expected. As did I anticipate the message from Bill. The one that caught me off-guard today? Jack Nicholson. Sorry there, pal, and I know you're a Jersey native, but if you really want me to take political advice from you, stop making late-career dreck like The Bucket List. (Obama fan George Clooney, on the other hand, has a very respectable and consistent Tomatometer record.)
And hold on, Senator Obama, I'm not letting you off that easy. If on Monday you send me an e-mail with this subject line:
From: Barack Obama
Subject: One last thing...
Jack --
Tomorrow is Primary Day in New Jersey, and I'm writing to you with an important reminder to vote and to make sure that your family, friends, and neighbors get out and vote too.
Then on Tuesday, you are NOT allowed to send me an e-mail that begins:
From: Barack Obama
To: Jack Silbert
Sent: Tuesday, February 5, 2008 7:00:06 AM
Subject: RE: One last thing...
Jack --
Today, you can join nearly half the nation in saying that we are tired of business-as-usual in Washington, we are hungry for change, and we are ready to believe again.
Oooh I'm mad. I guess what I'm saying is, don't try me, folks. Or I'm likely to once again cast my ballot for the only candidate who has always been there for me—the Trix Rabbit.
Labels: Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, New Jersey, politics, purposely using a label someone else already used
posted by Jack Silbert at
8:19 PM
19 Comments:
good glory...and all this time I did not even know you had a blog...because my news feed never informed me! I feel like a fool. but now I have discovered it, and life shall be the richer.
jack, what's happening here? now you're drawing readers? this is a lot of pressure.
I hope you're proud of that obnoxious jab. As if other wealthy, well-dressed lawyer-cum-senators would be better 'suited' to speak for the beleaguered. Spoken like a true man--and ever-so-whiney! By the way, you obviously failed to notice that while Clinton spent her money on phone calls, Obama spent plenty of his own on an endless parade of television ads, including a bunch during the Super Bowl--which, in case you didn't know, are kind of expensive.
and controversy! jack, you're killing this place!
Hillary voted for the war. And her explanation during the debates was not good enough for me.
All valid points, Bernie. But when people start stooping to the level of criticizing wardrobe choices and making implications about leadership qualities based on outward appearances like that, you start sounding pretty dumb.
20tauri, I'm primarily writing humor, not political commentary. That being said, I cast my ballot for Barack Obama. His views match up more closely with mine than Hillary Clinton's do. (Dennis Kucinich, who I agreed with most closely, didn't have a chance in this race, let's face it. And Al Gore isn't running. Yet.) Beyond policy, I look at Hillary Clinton and I see someone who has taken a calculated, methodical path to this point in her career, and that just doesn't inspire me. Maybe I've bought the hype, but I see more of a human being in the person of Barack Obama. I see a more electable candidate. I see someone I'm willing the roll the dice on.
And though I stand behind my pantsuit quip, I am genuinely puzzled by the Hispanic community's support of Mrs. Clinton, and I wonder if it points to some deeply ingrained and very regrettable disconnect between the U.S.'s Latino and African-American communities.
Bill lost me, and by proxy, so did Hillary after his antics in South Carolina. Politics is dirty, but I guess for me there is a line, and Bill crossed it by injecting race into it in such a calculating way. I agree with Democratic leaders like Tom Daschle who called his actions "unpresidential." For the record, I also call George Bush's entire presidency "unpresidential" so there ya go.
I think a man's comb-over is fair game, and I think a pantsuit is fair game as well, in a humor essay.
20tauri, fair enough, but we're going to hold you to that concerning Huckabee's appearance (and prior appearance)
Well, enjoy your quips, boys. I think you will find that this kind of "humor" is partly what turns many of us female voters off of the Obama train.
bernie is a woman. you can safely assume jack silbert is a man. chris is up for grabs.
and did you not think the talk about al gore and earth tones in 2000 was about his appearance? i'm just not sure the issue of appearance in politics is a sexist one.
George has always taken a lot of heat for his eyes being too close together.
I don't hate Hilary and I don't hate Obama. I'm 100% undecided. Though, I must say I love the idea of universal health care and also think this video is funny.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rleUPHX8yfM
Is it me, or is there a certain Mae West vibe to 20tauri's "enjoy your quips, boys" statement? Uh-oh, will that get me in trouble?
John, I'll have you know that I've been vetted by several physicians, all of whom seem to agree that I am at the very least a modified eunuch. Face!!!
my problem with hillary isn't just the unapologetic iraq vote. it's the iran vote along with her mantra that the iraqis need to "take responsibility." what does that mean?
i do suspect she's more gay friendly than obama. i like that about her.
More gay friendly than Obama??? Impossible!
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