aloha!
The last day in Hawaii, checkout time at the hotel was noon. Our flight wasn't until ten at night, so we reserved a car and driver; that way, we could tour the island, then slowly work our way to the airport.The man who answered the phone at the limo company asked what we wanted to see on our tour. When I said I'd leave it largely to the discretion of the driver, I knew he would send his best man.
Michael was an experienced driver with a side business in aromatherapy. He started us off with one kind of scent, before slyly announcing he'd switched to a pine blend halfway through. He has fourteen children and seemed particularly proud of one who was turning out well. He was obsessed with real estate, describing many parts of Hawaii as the "Beverly Hills of..." (it's the Beverly Hills of Waikiki, it's the Beverly Hills of Kailua).
He drove us to various lookout points, where he would get out of the car and, in his suit, personally escort us to the romantic bluff. We'd stand there a while, until he decided we were sufficiently awed, at which point we'd head together back to the car. I whispered to Bernie to get a shot of me and Michael looking out at the scene together. The next stop, as he was extending his arm to highlight the view for us, I subtly put my arm around him. But Bernie hadn't brought her camera. After that, she brought the camera, but he mysteriously lingered behind (this is when he changed the scent to pine, I strongly suspect).
Michael name dropped with abandon, and I can only hope to one day be added to his arsenal. He has driven (or "taken care of" in his parlance) Adam Sandler, Cameron Diaz, John Travolta, Los Angeles Lakers, and a real-life Hawaiian princess. He confided proudly that he takes care of the cast of Lost. "Then you need to take a little more care of them, they keep getting arrested for drunk driving, they shouldn't be driving," Bernie said immediately, the first time she'd spoken in quite a while.
Michael went into a little bit of a shell after that. And we drove in blissful silence, watching the ocean, smelling the pine.
Labels: travels
posted by John Levenstein at
1:27 PM
5 Comments:
In retrospect, perhaps I should have been direct right off the bat: no, I do not want to hear about celebrities, no, I do not care which houses they live in, and no, I don't care that that house cost 18 million and is owned by an Arab sheik.
I would have loved some tour about native plants and animals and hell, native people, but Michael sure wasn't the one for that.
Ken, if you are reading, some great cardinals here. I need you or Isa or both to point out the birds, as there are definitely some striking ones.
Bernie, the fact that you don't care about the celebrities is a good thing. I'd bet though that 90% of the tourists whom (who?) Michael takes around want to see the expensive houses and couldn't care less about the plants and animals. You may not be Michael's usual audience.
I think many of the birds you saw (if not a vast majority of them) were introduced species. Hawaii's native birds have been decimated for a number of reasons that I won't go into here. Suffice it to say it's a variation of the story in Guam which you are familiar with.
Anyway, I know that both the Northern Cardinal (common throughout much of the U.S.), and the Brazilian Cardinal have been introduced there.
He shouldn't be there, but that Brazilian Cardinal is a good-looking guy!
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